If I asked you how to network to find a job, you'd have a different answer than the person sitting next to you.
Everyone knows they need to network more, but very few people do it.
Most people struggle to network because they believe it is too much effort.
But what if you could make your networking "effortless?"
I recently finished reading Effortless by Greg McKeown. You many recognize McKeown as the author of Essentialism, which was his first book and a best seller.
In Essentialism, he focuses us on doing only the things in our lives that are essential. In his next book, Effortless, McKeown admits, from his own experience, there are times when the number of essential things in our lives exceeds our capacity.
The problem Effortless tries to solve is the “big rock” problem.
You've probably heard the story McKeown shares at the start of his new book:
A teacher has a large glass jar and piles of sand, gravel, and rocks. When he puts the sand in first, then the gravel, then the big rocks, he runs out of room, but when he puts the big rocks in first, then the gravel, and then the sand, it all fits.
The visual representation emphasizes putting your big rocks, the really important things in life, first. Then you put the smaller things, the gravel and the sand, in next so those less important things fill in the space that is left around the big rocks.
In McKeown's model of the universe, the big rocks would be the essential things, but over time, he found in his own life, sometimes you have more big rocks than you have space for in the jar.
You may have a family, a job, and other “big rocks” in your life that are essential to the vision for how you want to live.
How do you handle all of these big rocks?
You need to find a way to make the big rocks effortless.
He writes, "Essentialism was about doing the right things; Effortless is about doing them in the right way."
McKeown breaks his concept of making the essential things effortless into three phases:
Effortless State - Think easier
Effortless Action - Act Simpler
Effortless Results - Get compound results
As I read through the book, it occurred to me I could take these concepts and apply them to professional networking. Most people I talk to would say growing a vibrant professional network is essential to a successful career or business, but how can you make it effortless?
Effortless is a great read. I recommend it for anyone, especially if you read McKeown's first book. It has a number of thought-provoking ideas, but these were the top 5 I found that will make your networking effortless:
Invert
We have this belief that in order for something to be worth doing, it has to be hard, but our brains are hardwired to resist doing hard things.
Instead of thinking, "Why is this so hard?" We should invert the question and ask ourselves, "What if this could be easy?"
One of the aspects of networking that is daunting, especially for introverts, is meeting strangers. That’s the hard version of networking, but what if it could be easy?
What would it look like?
What if we could network without meeting strangers, and instead, we could network with people we already know?
Don't you already have a group of people you know?
Wouldn't it be easier to talk to them and get them to introduce you to the people they know?
Isn't that easier than meeting strangers and hoping for a connection?
You have many people you have met in life, but don't talk to an a daily basis. These are your dormant ties. Reach out to your dormant ties. As you re-establish your relationship with these people, they will start to introduce you to new people.
Re-connect.
It’ll be easier than approaching strangers.
Take The Smallest, First Step
When we get started on something new, it's easy for us to think of all the steps it's going to take to finish the task. McKeown uses the example of Netflix and how the founder, Reed Hastings, started thinking about the idea of renting DVDs by mail so he could avoid going to Blockbuster to return movies.
He could have gotten all wrapped up in the logistics of how to buy DVDs and what the website would be like, but instead, he did the first, smallest step: He sent himself a DVD by mail.
All he focused on was answering the question, “Can I send a DVD in the mail and have it show up undamaged and watchable?”
Too often, we get stuck doing something new because we don't take that smallest first step.
The same thing happens in networking. We think, "I have to connect with people and then talk to them and then develop a relationship with them and then help them out so they'll help me out."
We get overwhelmed when we think about doing this for multiple people. The overwhelm over-complicates the process and we never take action.
If we focus on the first step, what is it?
Is it contacting someone?
No! You have to know who to contact first. The smallest first step is asking yourself, “Who do I know?”
Remember, to make this effortless, what it would look like if it were easy, we are starting with who we already know.
Focus on creating a list of people you already know. This is the first step. Don't think about anything else until you do this.
Once you've got your list, then you can move on to the next step, which is contacting the people on your list.
Go through each step one at a time and don't focus on anything else until you complete the step.
Pace Yourself
McKeown uses a common special forces phrase, "Slow is smooth, smooth is fast," to explain how we should pace ourselves whenever we try to make something effortless. When we rush, we make things harder. If we slow down and focus on making things smoother, we will go faster in the end.
The same concept applies to networking. Take your time, slow down, and make your efforts smooth.
It shouldn't feel frantic or rushed. When you are taking the smallest first step, focus on getting it done, but make it smooth.
Then do the same thing the next day, and the next. If you have a slower, smoother pace in your efforts, you'll find your networking will start delivering results quickly.
If you show up each day and stay consistent, before you know it, you'll have more people connecting and asking you to work with them than you can actually handle.
It takes a little bit of time but if you keep it slow and smooth, you'll have results before you know it.
What is "Done?"
One of the challenges with any personal or professional project is knowing when to stop.
When is the project over?
What does "done" look like?
When we don't define what "done" looks like, we are prone to tinkering with whatever we are working on forever.
As a result, it feels like we never get to the end and never feel satisfied with what we've accomplished.
Networking is something that may never feel “done.” It's not a project. It's more like a habit.
However, when people start trying to network, many get started, but they stop because they never get the sense of accomplishment of being "done."
Networking is never really done, but to make it effortless, define what "done" looks like.
Think about connecting with one person.
What does it look like when you have a connection?
Is it that you feel comfortable asking them a question or asking them for an introduction?
If so, keep that in mind.
What would you have to do to get to that point?
And when you get there, is that “done?”
That's how I think about it. Could I get to a point in my relationship where I could contact that person anytime and have a conversation with them?
You'll have a lot of "dones" while you network, but by focusing on these one at a time, you'll feel successful, which will help you keep going with your networking.
Set Limits
I already talked about getting started, which is the tiniest, first step, but you also have to keep yourself from doing too much or else you're going to get overwhelmed and create unsustainable expectations for yourself.
In order to prevent this, McKeown explains you need to set limits by saying, "I will never do less than X, never more than Y."
You don't need to connect with 100 people, ten might be enough, or five, or if you feel like it’s effortless, one is enough.
Connect with at least one but never more than five.
If you find five connections a week is easy, move it up to six and see if it still feels effortless.
The limits, lower and upper, give you realistic expectations that keep you going without making your feel burned out.
Summary
Invert - Ask yourself, “What would networking look like if it were easy?”
Take The Smallest, First Step - What is the first step? Take it. Don’t worry about anything else.
Pace Yourself - Don’t rush, but keep your networking smooth.
What is “Done?” - Define networking success and celebrate each one.
Set Limits - Commit to lower and upper limits with your networking.
Of course, you can apply the concepts in Effortless to anything in your life.
But networking is something we don’t do because it feels like too much effort.
What if you could make it easier? What if you could use these ideas to make networking effortless?
Would you be more likely commit to growing your professional network?
IF YOU WANT TO GET BETTER AT PROFESSIONAL NETWORKING, BE SURE TO CHECK OUT MY FREE GUIDE, 15 MINUTE NETWORKING OR MY BOOK, THE FAST AND EASY GUIDE TO NETWORKING FOR INTROVERTS.
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